I started my IOP today less OK that I started yesterday. There will be dips on the road to recovery, right? The thing is, I was exhausted. I slept terribly last night. I went to bed a little later than usual, but not too late. I still could have gotten eight hours if I hadn’t…
Today was different at my IOP. Not in any tangible way. I was still the first one there. We still started with check-ins and then moved on to skills. It felt different, though. For the first time at the IOP, when I said I was OK (I always say I’m OK), I meant it. I…
I overslept again this morning. I was still the first person at the IOP. In fact, I was about fifteen minutes early. That’s just because I’m preternaturally on time. I still had to rush which I hate doing. My check-in was good. I mostly talked about my weekend, which wasn’t good. I had a migraine…
Week three of the IOP is done. In theory, I’m halfway there. Today got off to a rocky start. I overslept again, and I was feeling anxious again. Maybe some rest over the weekend can fix both problems. I don’t really remember today’s check-in. I think it was fairly thorough. And I think I talked…
For the second day in a row, I had a lot of anxiety when I woke up this morning. It’s funny, I don’t think of myself as prone to anxiety. I think of myself as more of a calmly depressed person. Not the last couple of days, though. Unlike yesterday, it didn’t make it hard…
After four days off, I was back at my IOP today. I was really anxious going in. I’m not sure why. Maybe the break threw my rhythm off or maybe I hadn’t gotten enough sleep. Whatever it was, I was nervous to go. It was to the point of trying to find an excuse not…
I’m through the second full week of my intensive outpatient program (IOP). This week was kind of a mixed bag. Last week, I felt like I made some progress. This week I had a bit of a dip. That’s to be expected in this sort of thing, but it’s still frustrating. For my check-in today,…
I overslept this morning. I was on time to the IOP, in fact I was the first one there, but I had to rush. I hate being rushed. It got my day off to a bad start. Check-ins were pretty standard today. I talked about how most of yesterday afternoon was good, but then I…
After yesterday’s Zoom session, today was back to normal, in person, IOP. And, unlike yesterday, we had a big group. I’m torn about whether I like big group or small group better. I get less work done during big group, but I stand out more during small group. I guess it’s a tossup. I had…
Turns out snow does affect my IOP. Today’s group was over Zoom. And only one other person showed up. We had the clinician and two group members. And the other group member only lasted the first two hours. The third hour was just me and the clinician. Needless to say, it was a weird day….
